Narcissists ruin birthdays and holidays on purpose. It’s the strangest thing.
They make up some “very important excuse” as to why they can’t participate; buy or make a gift; get or make a cake; write a nice card or get any card, etc.
They will choose that moment to throw a tantrum, suddenly have a different, contrasting, non celebratory mood, “be mad at” the birthday person, be “really sick” or distraught in some way AND demanding of their partner to abstain from the festivities and if partner does not they pout, withdraw, etc….
OR at the very least, they will passive aggressively hijack attention and conversation topics… any reason not to honor, or detract attention from the person whose day it is.
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